Thursday, December 31, 2009
Another Year Past, Another Year Forward
It's that time again...time to reflect back on the year behind us and see what it meant to me.
I'm ending this year in a very different place than last year, at least geographically: back in DC. My return from Singapore in March was bittersweet; I came back to people who are important to me but left behind a life that I enjoyed. I had a fantastic time teaching and my time there ended on a high note. While I was there I really enjoyed the way I lived my life, it was a very social place with people doing stuff together every night. I resolved to live that way after coming home and to a large extent I've succeeded, though I can do a better job of balancing that! I miss Singapore, which is the main reason I headed back that way in September and would love to go back there again. At the time, living there permanently was a possibility, but with some changes in my career plans that option is on hold for now.
Those career changes have been interesting so far, and I'm curious to see what happens in 2010. Though I was planning on retiring from my current career and shifting gears to try something brand new, I was unexpectedly selected for promotion, and that has changed everything. Though I considered turning down the promotion -- after all, I'd already made the mental adjustments I needed to be ready to retire -- I realized there might be some interesting things I could do with this increased rank. As it turns out I've been interviewing for a teaching position here in town, and I think I have a good shot at it. If for some reason that doesn't work out then I'll have some decisions to make...there's a good chance I'll end up turning down the promotion if the assignment doesn't work out like I want. But it's still nice to be selected, because for someone like me who's done a lot of unusual things and who hasn't followed anything like a normal career path, getting promoted was a big surprise indeed.
Career-wise, by the way, my current job hasn't changed at all. It still sucks, and has all year. The saving grace has been that it's given me the chance to do different things outside my regular job because what I do day-to-day isn't very demanding.
Academically, I didn't do much after returning from Singapore. I didn't publish any papers this year, though I did finish a study that I think the State Department is using in crafting their Asia policy, and I presented a paper at a conference, so those are good things. I've still kept up with my writing, not only with my professional blog (which went over 200 entries this year) but also by writing a monthly column for a business newspaper here. Fun!
As is always the case in my life, the most important thing this year has been time with friends. I made some great new friends in Singapore...meeting Joshua at the end of 2008 turned out to be a great thing as our friendship took off and turned into something wonderful. At first I was happy to know him because I thought it was cool that a straight guy in Singapore was so open-minded, but I later I was happy just because he's a great guy. Immediately after the New Year I met Ed, who turned out to be one of my best friends there and to whom I still feel very close (in fact, we talked just this morning). A traveler like me, he managed to arrange his autumn vacation so we could spend about a week together in Singapore when I went back that way in September. It was during that trip that I finally got to know Ben in Singapore, a friend of Linh's whom I'd tried to get to know when I lived there but it just never worked out. In terms of meeting new people here at home, I'd have to say meeting Kevin was the highlight of my year. A doctor from Singapore here on a 2-year fellowship, he was on our dragon boat team and we ended up becoming good friends...during the summer it wasn't uncommon to see him, Stan, Linh and I running around town. I'm sorry he'll be leaving for home soon, but happy to know him. There are a few other folks I've met here whom I'd like to know better, but so far that's been moving slowly...people seem a little too busy to be making new friends, I guess.
Stan and I enjoyed the year together, up to and including his return to DC over Christmas. We had a wonderful relationship as boyfriends which has gone through some changes with his move to Denver and grad school, but that hasn't stopped him from being one of the most important people in my life. I'm very proud of him...he knew what he wanted, he overcame early frustrations to get it, and he's made the shift from full-time worker to full-time student with more ease than I think he realizes. I treasure what we had this year and I treasure what we still have...despite the change in his life, some things won't change.
Linh is my other close friend who went through a big transition this year, as he finished his graduate work and entered the "real" world (fortunately, staying in DC). We knew each other within about 6 weeks of his starting grad school so I got to see that entire process and was really pleased with the growth I saw in him, academically and personally, over those 2 years. I had a feeling that once he left school and had a more normal life we'd have a chance for our already great friendship to grow, and indeed it has. This is one of those friendships that I think will endure no matter what happens in the future.
Since Stan's departure in August I've pretty much avoided dating. I realized that since August 2000 I've either been in a relationship or living with my ex in a weird sort of limbo (Adrian, by the way, moved into his own place in July, leaving me in sole possession of the condo). Having spent all that time with people I decided I needed to make sure I'm OK on my own, that I haven't fallen into that trap of needing to be in a relationship. It's been a bit rocky at times but I'm getting a better handle on who I am as an individual, which had gotten a bit fuzzy at times over the years. Frankly, at this point, I'm waiting to see if someone asks ME out, rather than the other way around.
It's been a year for travel, as every year is for me. While living in Singapore I visited Bangkok and Hong Kong, and stopped in Tokyo for a few days on the way home, my first time there. Stan and I visited San Francisco, New York, and Denver, in addition to our 3-day road trip when we moved him out there. Kevin and I got to go to New York for the US Open, and I also made a later visit there on my own. I also got in a quick trip to Chicago for an academic conference, and that was good, even though it was COLD!! (and I finally got to meet David C on that trip!) In September I managed a 3-week trip back to KL to see my friends there (hi William, David, Azhan, Eddie, Janvier, DanielHenry, Froggy, and all the boys and girls) (and hi Nase, who I finally met!), to Singapore for the same reason, to Hong Kong for exactly the same reason (and to see the Big Buddha and finally go up Victoria Peak), and to Bintan Island for a couple days on the beach with Ed and one more ASEAN stamp in my passport. After going with Stan to Denver in August I headed to Vancouver to check out that city and also see my uncle in Victoria. Good times, eh.
Fitness-wise things only got better this year. I continued to improve my race times, missing my goal of breaking 80 minutes in the 10-miler but still running faster (and missing my goal by mere seconds) while shaving 14 minutes off my previous best marathon time. I ran the Hong Kong Marathon in February (my third) and set a personal record in that, with Tony and Max meeting me at the Finish with cupcakes and a Cathay Pacific flight crew who thought it was the greatest thing that I'd flown in just for the race. The next month Stan and I ran an 8K race in DC, the first race he's ever run, and I was so proud of him for doing that. I later ran two 10-milers and capped off the year with the Marine Corps Marathon, where I absolutely ripped up my old record and set a new standard of performance for myself. Much of my success has been due, I think, to a big improvement in my overall fitness. I've kept up with my gym routines from Singapore and have seen continuing improvement in my body, so much so that I was excited to be photographed for a friend's swimsuit calendar with Linh (and yes, we look hot!). Still not where I want it to be, but definitely getting there.
My health is still good, knock on wood. After 2008's cancer scare I had to have a follow-up colonoscopy this summer, and it came back OK. In Canada I had a sudden kidney stone attack, something that's never happened to me before and it scared me because I didn't know what it was, but after a few hours in the emergency room and some good meds over the next two days, I was fine. A couple of friends and family members have had tragic health problems this year, and those have reinforced my desire to live life as fully as I can now, for you never know when this precious gift can be taken from you.
As I reflect on the year gone by, I don't see much that's new. I had some great times, some great experiences, but mostly they came from the continuation of things I was already doing, or maybe some improvements...nothing really new. I can't think of too many new challenges that I took on, not much new that I studied and learned. That's unusual for me, and I'm not really sure why that happened. Did I just need a rest from change at the end of the decade? Do I have so many great things in my life that I didn't feel the need to add a lot of new stuff? I'm not sure. I guess it's OK, since part of the reason for not doing some new things I expected was the dramatic shift in career plans this year, but if I had to put my finger on what 2009 meant to me, it's kind of elusive. Next year, I have some new things lined up, and some emerging interests I want to explore...we'll see where those go!
When I look back at last year's end of the year post, I realize there are a couple things i said I hoped to do in 2009 that I didn't accomplish. First, I wanted to get back to Hawaii this year, but that didn't happen. I was planning to go in December to run the Honolulu Marathon and then stay for a vacation, but I realized a few things. First, I knew that I needed to save my legs rather than running a race only 7 weeks after the Marine Corps Marathon (a lesson I learned last year). Plus, I should save my money and my vacation days...one reason for not going was because of the big trip to Asia in September and I should be saving up after that for some travel coming early next year. And finally, I wasn't really in the mood to travel alone on this one...Linh had mentioned in July the possibility of going out there with me, but like me he had some big travel later in the year that didn't allow for a Hawaiian vacation in December. So, that one's on hold. I also didn't go to Thailand for massage school or kickboxing camp, mostly because I couldn't fit it into the September trip. But I'm planning to be back there in March and have already registered with the massage school (after seeing kickboxing in Bangkok last January I realized I probably don't need to go to kickboxing camp!). The other thing I wanted to do but don't feel I did was work on strengthening some friendships here, but I think I'll save that discussion for another time.
And yes, I'm looking forward to the future as well...to things I have planned for next year, to things I would like to do in the next year, and to things I still need to do at some point in my life. But I'll cover those next time.
For now, I'll just wish everyone a Happy New Year!!!!!
I'm ending this year in a very different place than last year, at least geographically: back in DC. My return from Singapore in March was bittersweet; I came back to people who are important to me but left behind a life that I enjoyed. I had a fantastic time teaching and my time there ended on a high note. While I was there I really enjoyed the way I lived my life, it was a very social place with people doing stuff together every night. I resolved to live that way after coming home and to a large extent I've succeeded, though I can do a better job of balancing that! I miss Singapore, which is the main reason I headed back that way in September and would love to go back there again. At the time, living there permanently was a possibility, but with some changes in my career plans that option is on hold for now.
Those career changes have been interesting so far, and I'm curious to see what happens in 2010. Though I was planning on retiring from my current career and shifting gears to try something brand new, I was unexpectedly selected for promotion, and that has changed everything. Though I considered turning down the promotion -- after all, I'd already made the mental adjustments I needed to be ready to retire -- I realized there might be some interesting things I could do with this increased rank. As it turns out I've been interviewing for a teaching position here in town, and I think I have a good shot at it. If for some reason that doesn't work out then I'll have some decisions to make...there's a good chance I'll end up turning down the promotion if the assignment doesn't work out like I want. But it's still nice to be selected, because for someone like me who's done a lot of unusual things and who hasn't followed anything like a normal career path, getting promoted was a big surprise indeed.
Career-wise, by the way, my current job hasn't changed at all. It still sucks, and has all year. The saving grace has been that it's given me the chance to do different things outside my regular job because what I do day-to-day isn't very demanding.
Academically, I didn't do much after returning from Singapore. I didn't publish any papers this year, though I did finish a study that I think the State Department is using in crafting their Asia policy, and I presented a paper at a conference, so those are good things. I've still kept up with my writing, not only with my professional blog (which went over 200 entries this year) but also by writing a monthly column for a business newspaper here. Fun!
As is always the case in my life, the most important thing this year has been time with friends. I made some great new friends in Singapore...meeting Joshua at the end of 2008 turned out to be a great thing as our friendship took off and turned into something wonderful. At first I was happy to know him because I thought it was cool that a straight guy in Singapore was so open-minded, but I later I was happy just because he's a great guy. Immediately after the New Year I met Ed, who turned out to be one of my best friends there and to whom I still feel very close (in fact, we talked just this morning). A traveler like me, he managed to arrange his autumn vacation so we could spend about a week together in Singapore when I went back that way in September. It was during that trip that I finally got to know Ben in Singapore, a friend of Linh's whom I'd tried to get to know when I lived there but it just never worked out. In terms of meeting new people here at home, I'd have to say meeting Kevin was the highlight of my year. A doctor from Singapore here on a 2-year fellowship, he was on our dragon boat team and we ended up becoming good friends...during the summer it wasn't uncommon to see him, Stan, Linh and I running around town. I'm sorry he'll be leaving for home soon, but happy to know him. There are a few other folks I've met here whom I'd like to know better, but so far that's been moving slowly...people seem a little too busy to be making new friends, I guess.
Stan and I enjoyed the year together, up to and including his return to DC over Christmas. We had a wonderful relationship as boyfriends which has gone through some changes with his move to Denver and grad school, but that hasn't stopped him from being one of the most important people in my life. I'm very proud of him...he knew what he wanted, he overcame early frustrations to get it, and he's made the shift from full-time worker to full-time student with more ease than I think he realizes. I treasure what we had this year and I treasure what we still have...despite the change in his life, some things won't change.
Linh is my other close friend who went through a big transition this year, as he finished his graduate work and entered the "real" world (fortunately, staying in DC). We knew each other within about 6 weeks of his starting grad school so I got to see that entire process and was really pleased with the growth I saw in him, academically and personally, over those 2 years. I had a feeling that once he left school and had a more normal life we'd have a chance for our already great friendship to grow, and indeed it has. This is one of those friendships that I think will endure no matter what happens in the future.
Since Stan's departure in August I've pretty much avoided dating. I realized that since August 2000 I've either been in a relationship or living with my ex in a weird sort of limbo (Adrian, by the way, moved into his own place in July, leaving me in sole possession of the condo). Having spent all that time with people I decided I needed to make sure I'm OK on my own, that I haven't fallen into that trap of needing to be in a relationship. It's been a bit rocky at times but I'm getting a better handle on who I am as an individual, which had gotten a bit fuzzy at times over the years. Frankly, at this point, I'm waiting to see if someone asks ME out, rather than the other way around.
It's been a year for travel, as every year is for me. While living in Singapore I visited Bangkok and Hong Kong, and stopped in Tokyo for a few days on the way home, my first time there. Stan and I visited San Francisco, New York, and Denver, in addition to our 3-day road trip when we moved him out there. Kevin and I got to go to New York for the US Open, and I also made a later visit there on my own. I also got in a quick trip to Chicago for an academic conference, and that was good, even though it was COLD!! (and I finally got to meet David C on that trip!) In September I managed a 3-week trip back to KL to see my friends there (hi William, David, Azhan, Eddie, Janvier, DanielHenry, Froggy, and all the boys and girls) (and hi Nase, who I finally met!), to Singapore for the same reason, to Hong Kong for exactly the same reason (and to see the Big Buddha and finally go up Victoria Peak), and to Bintan Island for a couple days on the beach with Ed and one more ASEAN stamp in my passport. After going with Stan to Denver in August I headed to Vancouver to check out that city and also see my uncle in Victoria. Good times, eh.
Fitness-wise things only got better this year. I continued to improve my race times, missing my goal of breaking 80 minutes in the 10-miler but still running faster (and missing my goal by mere seconds) while shaving 14 minutes off my previous best marathon time. I ran the Hong Kong Marathon in February (my third) and set a personal record in that, with Tony and Max meeting me at the Finish with cupcakes and a Cathay Pacific flight crew who thought it was the greatest thing that I'd flown in just for the race. The next month Stan and I ran an 8K race in DC, the first race he's ever run, and I was so proud of him for doing that. I later ran two 10-milers and capped off the year with the Marine Corps Marathon, where I absolutely ripped up my old record and set a new standard of performance for myself. Much of my success has been due, I think, to a big improvement in my overall fitness. I've kept up with my gym routines from Singapore and have seen continuing improvement in my body, so much so that I was excited to be photographed for a friend's swimsuit calendar with Linh (and yes, we look hot!). Still not where I want it to be, but definitely getting there.
My health is still good, knock on wood. After 2008's cancer scare I had to have a follow-up colonoscopy this summer, and it came back OK. In Canada I had a sudden kidney stone attack, something that's never happened to me before and it scared me because I didn't know what it was, but after a few hours in the emergency room and some good meds over the next two days, I was fine. A couple of friends and family members have had tragic health problems this year, and those have reinforced my desire to live life as fully as I can now, for you never know when this precious gift can be taken from you.
As I reflect on the year gone by, I don't see much that's new. I had some great times, some great experiences, but mostly they came from the continuation of things I was already doing, or maybe some improvements...nothing really new. I can't think of too many new challenges that I took on, not much new that I studied and learned. That's unusual for me, and I'm not really sure why that happened. Did I just need a rest from change at the end of the decade? Do I have so many great things in my life that I didn't feel the need to add a lot of new stuff? I'm not sure. I guess it's OK, since part of the reason for not doing some new things I expected was the dramatic shift in career plans this year, but if I had to put my finger on what 2009 meant to me, it's kind of elusive. Next year, I have some new things lined up, and some emerging interests I want to explore...we'll see where those go!
When I look back at last year's end of the year post, I realize there are a couple things i said I hoped to do in 2009 that I didn't accomplish. First, I wanted to get back to Hawaii this year, but that didn't happen. I was planning to go in December to run the Honolulu Marathon and then stay for a vacation, but I realized a few things. First, I knew that I needed to save my legs rather than running a race only 7 weeks after the Marine Corps Marathon (a lesson I learned last year). Plus, I should save my money and my vacation days...one reason for not going was because of the big trip to Asia in September and I should be saving up after that for some travel coming early next year. And finally, I wasn't really in the mood to travel alone on this one...Linh had mentioned in July the possibility of going out there with me, but like me he had some big travel later in the year that didn't allow for a Hawaiian vacation in December. So, that one's on hold. I also didn't go to Thailand for massage school or kickboxing camp, mostly because I couldn't fit it into the September trip. But I'm planning to be back there in March and have already registered with the massage school (after seeing kickboxing in Bangkok last January I realized I probably don't need to go to kickboxing camp!). The other thing I wanted to do but don't feel I did was work on strengthening some friendships here, but I think I'll save that discussion for another time.
And yes, I'm looking forward to the future as well...to things I have planned for next year, to things I would like to do in the next year, and to things I still need to do at some point in my life. But I'll cover those next time.
For now, I'll just wish everyone a Happy New Year!!!!!
Labels: Friends, Health, Life, Living in SG, Running, Teaching, Travel
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