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Do you ever have one of those years where you end up at a very different place from what you expected at the start? Yeah, it’s like that.

At the beginning of 2010 I was getting ready to be promoted to Colonel on July 1st, and go on to teach at a military university in Washington DC. But all of that changed. In March, I got word they were planning to send me to Baghdad instead, in a job that really would not make use of my talents and education. Not wanting to waste the next 3 years of my life (1 year in Baghdad, and no idea what would come next), I decided it was time to jump, and jump I did.

I’ve returned to my first love, teaching, at a major university in DC. I am about a million times happier than I was at the start of the year. The pay is not quite what I was used to, but my job satisfaction is so much greater. I am much, much happier doing this job than I have been in a long time, and that’s worth more than money.

I also started my own consulting firm, which I haven’t dome much with yet (the transition to teaching took a lot of my focus) but I expect to do something with that in the coming year.

This year I also moved to a new apartment, which has been fun. I’m in a better neighborhood, and in the same building as my best friend, which has been great.

Running went very well this year. Despite the problems I had with the Hong Kong Marathon in February, I recovered and went on to run the Flying Pig Marathon with Ethan in May. That was my first “run for fun, not for time” marathon, and it was great, despite the rain. In November, of course, I danced at the big dance by running in the New York City Marathon. I set a new Personal Record there, and in two years of running I’ve cut half an hour off of my marathon time, and with any luck the improvements will continue.

It’s been a big year for travel, but that’s not really new. As part of the Hong Kong trip I went on to Bangkok as well, to go to Thai massage school. A couple weeks later I flew off to Lisbon with Linh, the first time we’ve travelled together, and to a new place for both of us. Once I’d made the decision to retire and had some vacation time to use, I decided to visit Honolulu and use that as a jumping off point to return to Tokyo. That was pretty much it for a few months (well, except for some New York and San Francisco travel, and a great weekend in Boston visiting with Stan), but I’ll be spending New Year’s in Singapore and will go to Cambodia for a weekend…yay for the flexibility of an academic calendar!!

There are still things I didn’t really accomplish this year. I wanted to get better at photography, and didn’t really pursue that much. I’ve been trying to get to know more friends, and that’s gone a bit slower than expected.

But all in all it’s been good. I have gotten to know a couple new people, like Julian and Xiaohan and Kris, and finally got to know some of Linh’s Vietnamese friends, like Linh and Frank. I do see the potential to get to know some folks better, and that’s good, I really wanted to expand my circle. I dated some this year, and have met a couple very nice guys, so who knows how all that may work out. And of course, I can see again now that I finally gave myself the gift of LASIK.

Despite the huge transition this summer, which was very stressful at times, I’ve got to say it’s been a great year. Though I’m at a very different place from where I expected to be, I love the place I’m at, and am really happy with the way the year has worked out. I’ve had some “first time” experiences this year that have been everything I had hoped they would be, and I’m so happy to have some very wonderful people in my life.

As for next year…well I have some ideas, but as we saw this year, anything can happen…and it probably will.

Happy New Year!!!

Labels: Friends, Life, Running, Travel, Work

I do a lot.

Between travel, friends, running, a demanding job, self-development, and more, I have a lot that I want to accomplish. One reason for having such an active life is that I know there will come a point when I may not have the chance to do a lot of new things, so I want to take advantage of the time I have now. One thing I've learned from some friends' and family members' health problems is that that day could be decades away, or it could be tomorrow; you never know. Another reason is, there are just so many things I want to do, so many things that seem interesting, and I want to try them all.

And so, I make goals.

This helps me figure out what I want to do, prioritize what’s important and what’s not, and forces me to think about how to accomplish things so I can better overcome obstacles. It’s not so much that I sit around making lists and plans and itineraries, but I do try to have an idea of what comes next.

Back on New Year’s I didn’t have resolutions, but I did have goals for this year. I met them. In fact, I pretty much met them back in August.

New job This didn't turn out quite the way I expected. Still, I certainly managed to change jobs! I've found that I'm about 1,000,000% happier now that I'm out of the military. I'm not sure it was being in the Air Force that was the problem, as it much as it was the position I was in for the last 4 years (c'mon, I volunteered to go to Afghanistan to get out of my office!). In any case, I really enjoy my work now, and that's made a huge difference in my general happiness.

Travel with Linh This one almost didn't work out even before I tried, but his work schedule became such that we were able to head somewhere after all. The next question was deciding where to go, knowing as we did that we wanted to visit a place neither had been to before, and so we ended up with a fantastic week in Lisbon, Portugal. I've traveled alone a lot, and with a partner or boyfriend back when I had one, but traveling with friends is fairly new for me, and I like it!!

Explore emerging interests I'm slowly getting back into photography. It's fun, and I like grabbing my camera and going for a walk, though it certainly isn't second nature yet to start photographing at random. But I'm getting there. I also went to Bangkok and studied Thai massage, which some of my friends back here have appreciated a lot!

Run a marathon for fun Back in May ET and I flew off for a weekend in Cincinnati to run the Flying Pig Marathon. This was my "run for fun" race, which I really needed after running for time in Hong Kong and instead getting to know the paramedics afterwards. I tend to have a little more endurance in my legs than ET so he started fading at Mile 18 while I was still thinking we could set a new Personal Record. Rather than take off and leave him, though, we kept running together, which made for a GREAT finishing effort (never mind that he told me to shut up as I was encouraging him at the end lol).

Start a business I created a consulting firm in August. I haven't done much with it yet, as I've been settling into my teaching job, but I anticipate some cool opportunities in the next year.

Sometimes, new goals will emerge…it isn’t just a New Year’s thing. For example, I made the decision to run this year’s New York City Marathon, and that turned out pretty well.

When I was a kid I was one of those pretentious little twerps who tried to organize the other kids into things. I remember my mom telling me that maybe I should just focus on having fun. She was sort of right, but I’ve found a happy medium that is allowing me to have a pretty incredible life.

So, any suggestions for next year’s goals???

Labels: Friends, Life, Running, Travel, Work

"How, in the worst economy in 70 years, can you leave a secure government job, even turning down a promotion, without having something waiting for you on the outside?"

Labels: Friends, Life, Work

Maybe I shouldn't, but I do.

Labels: Friends, Life

I started running in January 2008, thanks in large part to encouragement from my friend Ethan, who had started the previous year. After a "practice" race with a distance of 8K, my first real race was the Cherry Blossom 10-Miler. I hoped to run it in 90 minutes, and I ended up beating that by a little more than a minute. Yeah, I was happy.

Labels: Friends, Running

In the end, I finished the race in 5:13:57, my worst race ever by 15 minutes. Had I been just a little slower I wouldn't have even been allowed to finish it. But far from being upset, I was pleased that even though Hong Kong had thrown everything at me that it could, I still beat it. I might have had to put my head between my knees to keep from fainting, but in reality, my head was held high.

Labels: Friends, Running, Travel

I’ve traveled a lot in the last year or so, but other than a quick weekend in Bintan last September, I haven’t traveled anywhere new since visits to HCMC and Penang in December 2008. I also haven’t been to Europe since a business trip took me to Germany (during Oktoberfest, no less) in 2006. So I was very happy to take a trip to Lisbon for a week in March and try something new. My friend Linh and I looked at a number of travel possibilities and I’m glad we settled on Lisbon.

The trip started with a bit of stress due to a cancelled flight and then another flight change, all of which saw us land in Portugal at 7am…needless to say, our hotel wasn’t quite ready for us. So we headed out to get something to eat and start exploring for a few hours, and I’ll admit I was a bit confused that first day.

After a day, though, I settled into the Lisbon pace. People there are pretty relaxed, without the mad crowds of New York or Bangkok or London. Everyone moves a little more slowly, whether on the streets or in a shop. The exception, though, is going for pastries and espresso in the afternoon…do NOT get between older Portuguese women and their Pastelis de Belem!!

We walked through streets where people hung their laundry outside their windows, visited castle grounds, strolled through the woods…all of it helped by the good weather we enjoyed throughout the trip. Unlike cities that have built upwards like San Francisco or Hong Kong, Lisbon has spread outward…the views from atop the hills (and we climbed a lot of hills) were beautiful, with no skyscrapers marring the view. We saw a man in a box, ladies in windows, penguins, people hanging onto the outside of the tram, an outdoor elevator, the mayor of Lisbon, an angry lady working in a restaurant, the town of Sintra, almond liqueur, and lots and lots of cuties.

The clubs, as I usually find overseas, were fun, crowded, and late. In the US many of our dance clubs close around 2 or 3, but in Lisbon and many other parts of Europe, people don’t even show up until then. Linh and I visited a wide range of bars before going dancing, so we got to see the locals in a variety of settings. When we went out Friday night I was ready to head home by 4:30, but on Saturday I was up for staying out later (maybe because I was getting flirted with this time?). We got back to the hotel around 5:30, showered, took a little nap, then got up at 7 for breakfast at the hotel before returning to bed until 3pm! A good choice, as it turned out, since, being a very Catholic country, lots of things were closed on Sunday anyway.

One really great part of this trip was finally traveling with Linh. Both of us love to travel and we’ve talked about going somewhere together, but the opportunity never worked out until now. He’s a great travel companion and we complemented each other pretty well on this trip. We both prefer to do more rather than less, we’re both up for late night clubbing (with disco naps, of course!), we both enjoy good food (and pastries!), and we also both understand that taking an afternoon to each go do our own thing is a good idea. One thing I really appreciated was his navigation skill – he got us everywhere we wanted to go. Having traveled quite a bit with Stan last year, and now with Linh, and looking toward an upcoming weekend trip with Ethan, I can say I’m thrilled to have the chance to go exploring with my closest friends.

So thank you, Lisbon, for a wonderful week. I might not have thought about traveling to you before, but I’ll be recommending you to all my friends now!

Labels: Friends, Travel

The dual snowstorms in Washington DC have kept me pretty much locked up for a week. Last Thursday I was at work most of the day but came home early to hit the grocery store and get ready for Friday's storm, which hit within a minute of the predicted time of 10am. Since then I've been out twice before today, during the brief (and only slightly safer) interlude between the storms.

This has not been a good experience for me.

I am not the sort of person who can go a week without interacting with anyone. I am not the sort of person who can be stuck in his apartment for an entire day because a power outage has left the elevators stopped. I am a social creature, perhaps more so than many other people, and I need human contact. And for a week, I didn't get it.

Every day I saw social plans fall through, so everything I looked forward to was taken away from me. One after another they became impossible. Many days, I saw photos of friends on Facebook doing things with each other, and even on those days I could have gotten out of here, I only heard about these afterwards...yeah, no invitations for me. I left a number of unanswered voicemails, sent any number of unanswered texts and e-mails. Fortunately, Linh and I check in with each other every morning (we do that regularly, not just during storms, because we both live alone) and that was typically the highlight of my day. I had more contact with people in Asia, or with strangers online, then I did with people here.

There were many things I could have accomplished with all this time off, and I did very few of them. Other than a bunch of reading (I hit the library after visiting the grocery the day before the first storm) I accomplished very little. I should have done more writing. I should have finished cleaning my place (hey, it's Tet/CNY this weekend!), I should have been in our condo's gym every day (well, every day the power was on), but I couldn't find the enthusiasm to do any of it. I mostly lay on the couch bouncing from site to site online, or watching bad TV. Not healthy, either physically or mentally. I didn't eat very well. A couple days, I didn't even bother taking a shower or shaving. Not good.

I don't think many of my friends realized how different this experience was for me than it was for them. Stan read an article comparing being stuck in the city or near a functioning Metro station versus being isolated (even just a few miles from downtown), and it was spot on. I had an email from one guy that read, "I haven't been out all week! Last night a group of us went to Nellie's, and saw some other friends, and stayed out way too late..." Yeah, I don't think he understands what "haven't been out all week" really means. :P

Fortunately, today I got out after a couple hours of shoveling snow, and got to spend a great couple of hours with Linh. I'm glad he was able to make the time for that because I was really starting to go a little crazy here and I couldn't stand being alone another day. But I can't rely on Linh for that, it's not fair to him, he's not responsible for me.

Just for giggles, tonight I looked up the symptoms of a Major Depressive Episode in the DSM-IV. It takes 5 symptoms to qualify as an Episode, and I can only truthfully point to 4 that I experienced, so that's a good thing, I suppose. But it doesn't change the fact that I was depressed almost to the point of nonfunctioning. I can point to the storm as a reason, but I've tried to pinpoint exactly what caused my problems, so I can avoid them in the future.

What it comes down to is my social nature, and the need to spend time with people. The reality is that I need other people more than they need me, and that's probably not good. On the other hand, my interest in being with others is probably a big part of what makes me a good person and a good friend, so it's not like I want to become a loner who doesn't need other people. The solution, at least when it comes to isolating incidents like this storm, is to move. And also, in general, to make more friends.

While I like having my own place, and I don't expect that to change, what DOES need to change is my location. I need to be someplace where it's easier to get out and about, not just during episodes like a winter storm but also just on regular evenings during the week, that sort of thing. I need to be near a Metro that I can walk to, I need to be close to grocery stores and cafes, and I need to be near friends. My plan for the last month or so has been to rent out my condo and take an apartment where I used to live in grad school. That fits all my needs, even though with the rental market being the way it is, I'm going to lose money on the deal. I'd like to do this soon, but the uncertainty surrounding my job situation this summer makes me hesitate for the moment.

The other thing I need is better friends. I have three people I can look to in DC as good friends, while a lot of the other people I call "friends" are rapidly turning into "acquaintances." While I'm very happy to have just a small trio of people with whom I feel really close, and with whom I can be open about anything, I need a circle of friends that comes in between them and my acquaintances. I thought I had that, but I was wrong, and since I'm planning to stay in DC it's time to work on that.

So this last week has really sucked, and it could happen again (another storm is possible on Monday). Rather than changing who I am and learning not to need people, I'm instead going to embrace who I am and, if anything, be more social. But instead of relying on others to fix my problems for me and take care of me, I'm going to work on them myself.

And THAT'S what I got out of this stupid weather.

Labels: Friends, Life

In addition to the big new things I'm hoping to do this year (one of which may have already been thwarted, dammit) there are also some things I want to do that aren't so much new, but which are still pretty fun. No surprise, they mostly involve friends and travel, and where possible, both.

One thing I want to do is see Stan in his new habitat. I was there for the apartment search, I was there for the move in, and now I want to be there after he's done a term and see how life is like there. In fact, I'm flying there this weekend. It'll be fun to see his new haunts (there are places that didn't exist when I lived there), I'm curious to meet his friends (who sound very nice), and if at all possible I'm hoping to go skiing with him. We'll see if that happens.

The long trip I have planned so far is to Hong Kong next month for the marathon, and then from there I'll go to Bangkok for the Thai massage class. Before returning to the US I'm hoping to spend a weekend somewhere new, such as Phuket, and am hoping to have a friend from Singapore come up for the weekend. Could be lots of fun!!!

Joshua is trying to plan a trip here just in time for my promotion. This would be his first time in the US and I'm really hoping this can work out!!

I'm giving some thought to moving to a new place here in the DC area, and regardless of what I end up doing I want to improve my happiness with my living situation.

I'll visit Chicago at least once, to see some friends there.

I really would like to get back to San Francisco, even if only for a long weekend.

Depending on how other travel plans shake out, I really would like to scuba dive this year, so a trip to the Bahamas is not out of the question.

There will be some New York in my future. Oh yes there will.

I want to learn how to photograph people.

My professional blog will get more exposure this year. Oh yeah.

I've recently reconnected with Dancin' Mike, who's been a friend for nearly 10 years but who had slipped under the radar for a bit. All is well now and I'm looking forward to spending more time with him. There are also a couple other longtime friends who have moved to DC this year that I need to rebuild the bonds with. And I'm meeting some new people, which is nice. As for those friends where the friendship wasn't too as strong as I liked, and which I have been trying for quite some time to build upon, well, I've realized maybe I don't need to put so much effort into those. 'Nuff said, for now anyway.

I'm going to have slumber parties.

I'll continue all my good habits (and there are lots of them!).

So that's this year.

Labels: Friends, Life, Travel

I always take some time at the end of the year to look back on all that's happened and try to make sense of it. As we hit these "Hallmark dates," as Linh called it, it's normal to pause and reflect (sometimes too much!). But it's important to also look forward, to get an idea of what I want to do so I can move in that direction. If 2009 was about just enjoying what I have (and that's as close as I can come to defining what last year meant to me) then 2010 will be a year of self-understanding and improvement.

Though I don't set New Year's resolutions for myself -- if something's worth doing, there's no reason to wait for a single date on the calendar to do it -- I do have some things I want to accomplish in the next year. In all cases, I'm already making plans, and I'll do what I can to make them all happen. These are the most important new things I want to take on.

New job My original plan for 2009 was a major career change, with retirement from my current line of work and a transition to something completely new. Well, those plans are on hold because I was selected for promotion (which will kick in July 1, as near as I can tell) and i saw opportunities that didn't exist before, so I've decided to stick around another couple years and see what happens. Though starting a new job isn't the most important thing to me, it's the one thing that will probably have the most profound impact in my happiness this year. Since my current job has been largely a waste of my time and talent, I'm looking forward to something new...specifically, to a teaching position for which I'm being considered. It would involve teaching at the master's degree level, which I enjoyed while in Singapore, and it would allow me to stay in DC, which is my #1 job consideration. I love teaching, and from what I've seen of the working environment at this school, it would be an enjoyable place to work. Not perfect, not somewhere i want to stay forever, but a good stepping stone to other things i want to do professionally. If the teaching gig falls through, i'll have to reconsider my retirement plans, so it'll be interesting to see where I am a year from now.

Travel with Linh I've known Linh for over 2 years, and even though we both love travel, we have yet to travel together. The closest we've come is a dinner and short adventure one evening in 2008 when I was visiting Bangkok and he was there for an internship, and a short layover for him in Singapore 363 days ago while I was living there. Those, of course, don't count, and so I've been hoping to actually take a trip together sometime. We talked about a couple ideas in 2009 after he graduated but our schedules didn't mesh. Now, we're looking at a week-long trip in March, and hopefully we can coordinate our personal and work schedules to make this happen. Though I often enjoy traveling on my own, I get a real thrill from traveling with someone important to me, as past trips with others have shown, and I would love for this to work out this year. Ideally, we'll go someplace neither one of us has been, allowing us to really get into exploration mode. We've discussed a couple options, and no, it won't be to Asia!

Explore emerging interests In the last few months there are a few things that have popped up as new or returning interests, things I want to explore more fully in 2010. For some reason, don't ask me why, I've gotten interested in massage. Perhaps because I know how good it feels to receive one, I'd like to give that good feeling to others. I've been teaching myself some basics using books and practicing on friends, and in the spring I'm planning to attend the Wat Po School in Bangkok to study traditional Thai massage. This sounds like fun, and some friends are already making requests for massages. I've also been enjoying cooking and baking a bit more lately, and with encouragement from Linh I'm going to try to take my baking to a new level, not just with the cookies and candy I make but moving on to cakes and pastries as well. I'd like to get really proficient at creating desserts, and if nothing else I get to eat the mistakes. Finally, in the last few months I've had the time to start dabbling more in photography again, an interest I sort of gave up a few years ago, for reasons i don't understand. Anyway, it's time to get serious about this again.

Run a marathon for fun Ever since I started running in January 2007, and ran my first race that spring, I've been trying to improve. I don't compete against others in races, but I do compete against myself. I like the idea of continuous improvement in my running times, and I was pretty successful with that in 2009. But at the same time, I want to be able to step back from that, to not worry about the results but just get out there because it's fun to be part of a big race. When I go to Hong Kong for February's marathon I'm planning to push myself (though my training for that race is not going so well) but in May I'm running the Flying Pig Marathon with Ethan, and I'm just going to plan to run his pace regardless of whether that's faster or slower. I'm going there to run with him, so I plan to do the whole race with him, and if that's at a faster pace, great, but if we're slower, that's cool too. Sometimes we should forget about improvement and just focus on the doing. I'm also hoping to run the New York City Marathon in November, but haven't decided which approach to take to that one -- I think it depends on whether I'm running it alone or if Ethan is running it too.

Start a business As part of my preparation for retirement and career change, I intend to set up a business this year. The idea is to start learning about what I need to make a consulting business successful, and begin laying a foundation for when I actually do retire. Though I can't work on it full time, I've already talked with Stan and Linh about being a part of this, giving them an opportunity to put their particular talents to work, to do something a little different, and maybe to make a little extra money (which no one minds doing). With their collaboration this could be very cool. I expect this to start small and grow slowly, so not much is likely to happen with it this year, but at least I can take the first important steps. As part of this, I'm hoping to expand the exposure of my professional blog and also start generating some more income from that, so at least it pays for itself.

There are some other things I want to do this year, and later in the future too, but I'll save those for next time, as this is turning into a longer post than I planned.

Labels: Friends, Life, Running, Teaching, Travel, Work

It's that time again...time to reflect back on the year behind us and see what it meant to me.

I'm ending this year in a very different place than last year, at least geographically: back in DC. My return from Singapore in March was bittersweet; I came back to people who are important to me but left behind a life that I enjoyed. I had a fantastic time teaching and my time there ended on a high note. While I was there I really enjoyed the way I lived my life, it was a very social place with people doing stuff together every night. I resolved to live that way after coming home and to a large extent I've succeeded, though I can do a better job of balancing that! I miss Singapore, which is the main reason I headed back that way in September and would love to go back there again. At the time, living there permanently was a possibility, but with some changes in my career plans that option is on hold for now.

Those career changes have been interesting so far, and I'm curious to see what happens in 2010. Though I was planning on retiring from my current career and shifting gears to try something brand new, I was unexpectedly selected for promotion, and that has changed everything. Though I considered turning down the promotion -- after all, I'd already made the mental adjustments I needed to be ready to retire -- I realized there might be some interesting things I could do with this increased rank. As it turns out I've been interviewing for a teaching position here in town, and I think I have a good shot at it. If for some reason that doesn't work out then I'll have some decisions to make...there's a good chance I'll end up turning down the promotion if the assignment doesn't work out like I want. But it's still nice to be selected, because for someone like me who's done a lot of unusual things and who hasn't followed anything like a normal career path, getting promoted was a big surprise indeed.

Career-wise, by the way, my current job hasn't changed at all. It still sucks, and has all year. The saving grace has been that it's given me the chance to do different things outside my regular job because what I do day-to-day isn't very demanding.

Academically, I didn't do much after returning from Singapore. I didn't publish any papers this year, though I did finish a study that I think the State Department is using in crafting their Asia policy, and I presented a paper at a conference, so those are good things. I've still kept up with my writing, not only with my professional blog (which went over 200 entries this year) but also by writing a monthly column for a business newspaper here. Fun!

As is always the case in my life, the most important thing this year has been time with friends. I made some great new friends in Singapore...meeting Joshua at the end of 2008 turned out to be a great thing as our friendship took off and turned into something wonderful. At first I was happy to know him because I thought it was cool that a straight guy in Singapore was so open-minded, but I later I was happy just because he's a great guy. Immediately after the New Year I met Ed, who turned out to be one of my best friends there and to whom I still feel very close (in fact, we talked just this morning). A traveler like me, he managed to arrange his autumn vacation so we could spend about a week together in Singapore when I went back that way in September. It was during that trip that I finally got to know Ben in Singapore, a friend of Linh's whom I'd tried to get to know when I lived there but it just never worked out. In terms of meeting new people here at home, I'd have to say meeting Kevin was the highlight of my year. A doctor from Singapore here on a 2-year fellowship, he was on our dragon boat team and we ended up becoming good friends...during the summer it wasn't uncommon to see him, Stan, Linh and I running around town. I'm sorry he'll be leaving for home soon, but happy to know him. There are a few other folks I've met here whom I'd like to know better, but so far that's been moving slowly...people seem a little too busy to be making new friends, I guess.

Stan and I enjoyed the year together, up to and including his return to DC over Christmas. We had a wonderful relationship as boyfriends which has gone through some changes with his move to Denver and grad school, but that hasn't stopped him from being one of the most important people in my life. I'm very proud of him...he knew what he wanted, he overcame early frustrations to get it, and he's made the shift from full-time worker to full-time student with more ease than I think he realizes. I treasure what we had this year and I treasure what we still have...despite the change in his life, some things won't change.

Linh is my other close friend who went through a big transition this year, as he finished his graduate work and entered the "real" world (fortunately, staying in DC). We knew each other within about 6 weeks of his starting grad school so I got to see that entire process and was really pleased with the growth I saw in him, academically and personally, over those 2 years. I had a feeling that once he left school and had a more normal life we'd have a chance for our already great friendship to grow, and indeed it has. This is one of those friendships that I think will endure no matter what happens in the future.

Since Stan's departure in August I've pretty much avoided dating. I realized that since August 2000 I've either been in a relationship or living with my ex in a weird sort of limbo (Adrian, by the way, moved into his own place in July, leaving me in sole possession of the condo). Having spent all that time with people I decided I needed to make sure I'm OK on my own, that I haven't fallen into that trap of needing to be in a relationship. It's been a bit rocky at times but I'm getting a better handle on who I am as an individual, which had gotten a bit fuzzy at times over the years. Frankly, at this point, I'm waiting to see if someone asks ME out, rather than the other way around.

It's been a year for travel, as every year is for me. While living in Singapore I visited Bangkok and Hong Kong, and stopped in Tokyo for a few days on the way home, my first time there. Stan and I visited San Francisco, New York, and Denver, in addition to our 3-day road trip when we moved him out there. Kevin and I got to go to New York for the US Open, and I also made a later visit there on my own. I also got in a quick trip to Chicago for an academic conference, and that was good, even though it was COLD!! (and I finally got to meet David C on that trip!) In September I managed a 3-week trip back to KL to see my friends there (hi William, David, Azhan, Eddie, Janvier, DanielHenry, Froggy, and all the boys and girls) (and hi Nase, who I finally met!), to Singapore for the same reason, to Hong Kong for exactly the same reason (and to see the Big Buddha and finally go up Victoria Peak), and to Bintan Island for a couple days on the beach with Ed and one more ASEAN stamp in my passport. After going with Stan to Denver in August I headed to Vancouver to check out that city and also see my uncle in Victoria. Good times, eh.

Fitness-wise things only got better this year. I continued to improve my race times, missing my goal of breaking 80 minutes in the 10-miler but still running faster (and missing my goal by mere seconds) while shaving 14 minutes off my previous best marathon time. I ran the Hong Kong Marathon in February (my third) and set a personal record in that, with Tony and Max meeting me at the Finish with cupcakes and a Cathay Pacific flight crew who thought it was the greatest thing that I'd flown in just for the race. The next month Stan and I ran an 8K race in DC, the first race he's ever run, and I was so proud of him for doing that. I later ran two 10-milers and capped off the year with the Marine Corps Marathon, where I absolutely ripped up my old record and set a new standard of performance for myself. Much of my success has been due, I think, to a big improvement in my overall fitness. I've kept up with my gym routines from Singapore and have seen continuing improvement in my body, so much so that I was excited to be photographed for a friend's swimsuit calendar with Linh (and yes, we look hot!). Still not where I want it to be, but definitely getting there.

My health is still good, knock on wood. After 2008's cancer scare I had to have a follow-up colonoscopy this summer, and it came back OK. In Canada I had a sudden kidney stone attack, something that's never happened to me before and it scared me because I didn't know what it was, but after a few hours in the emergency room and some good meds over the next two days, I was fine. A couple of friends and family members have had tragic health problems this year, and those have reinforced my desire to live life as fully as I can now, for you never know when this precious gift can be taken from you.

As I reflect on the year gone by, I don't see much that's new. I had some great times, some great experiences, but mostly they came from the continuation of things I was already doing, or maybe some improvements...nothing really new. I can't think of too many new challenges that I took on, not much new that I studied and learned. That's unusual for me, and I'm not really sure why that happened. Did I just need a rest from change at the end of the decade? Do I have so many great things in my life that I didn't feel the need to add a lot of new stuff? I'm not sure. I guess it's OK, since part of the reason for not doing some new things I expected was the dramatic shift in career plans this year, but if I had to put my finger on what 2009 meant to me, it's kind of elusive. Next year, I have some new things lined up, and some emerging interests I want to explore...we'll see where those go!

When I look back at last year's end of the year post, I realize there are a couple things i said I hoped to do in 2009 that I didn't accomplish. First, I wanted to get back to Hawaii this year, but that didn't happen. I was planning to go in December to run the Honolulu Marathon and then stay for a vacation, but I realized a few things. First, I knew that I needed to save my legs rather than running a race only 7 weeks after the Marine Corps Marathon (a lesson I learned last year). Plus, I should save my money and my vacation days...one reason for not going was because of the big trip to Asia in September and I should be saving up after that for some travel coming early next year. And finally, I wasn't really in the mood to travel alone on this one...Linh had mentioned in July the possibility of going out there with me, but like me he had some big travel later in the year that didn't allow for a Hawaiian vacation in December. So, that one's on hold. I also didn't go to Thailand for massage school or kickboxing camp, mostly because I couldn't fit it into the September trip. But I'm planning to be back there in March and have already registered with the massage school (after seeing kickboxing in Bangkok last January I realized I probably don't need to go to kickboxing camp!). The other thing I wanted to do but don't feel I did was work on strengthening some friendships here, but I think I'll save that discussion for another time.

And yes, I'm looking forward to the future as well...to things I have planned for next year, to things I would like to do in the next year, and to things I still need to do at some point in my life. But I'll cover those next time.

For now, I'll just wish everyone a Happy New Year!!!!!

Labels: Friends, Health, Life, Living in SG, Running, Teaching, Travel

I e-mailed someone over the weekend and when he replied he said "I figured you were with your family for the holidays so I thought I'd wait to write you until you got back." The reality, though, is that I was right here in DC at my home, with my folks 200 miles away at theirs.

Holidays are often time for family, at least that's the tradition, but in my case it's been a time to think about family. Add in a recent funeral and you've got a mix that just screams "think deep thoughts!"

So I did. And I've come to the conclusion my family isn't as important to me as you might like to think.

I was at my parents' home for Thanksgiving last month, for three nights. It was the first time I've been there since April, only the second time since my return from Singapore (though my mom did come up for a few days in July). Just me and my folks. And three nights was all I could do...one more would have been too much.

While there I sent a note to my aunt and uncle who'd moved to Atlanta earlier this year. My uncle had a brain tumor but moved anyway to keep his job, which had moved down south, in order to keep his health insurance (I recently learned that he had the opportunity to stay in Virginia but wanted to go to stay with his friends from work). My aunt replied that if I wanted to see my uncle again I'd better come to Atlanta soon. And I knew right then I probably wouldn't make that trip. As I looked ahead to the month of December I knew getting away for a weekend would be really disruptive to my plans for the month, and so I started looking at just flying down in the morning on a weekday, visiting them for a few hours, then flying back to DC, as soon as work would allow, which would be at least 2 more weeks.

Why didn't I rush right down there? In part, because I can't stand my uncle's wife...she's a nag, she could never hold a job, she's ignorant and racist and a bad mother and she created an extra burden for my uncle for many years because she must weigh over 250 pounds. But I also realized that my uncle and I have drifted apart in the past few years, because he frankly has a lot of those same attributes...I just didn't pay as much attention to them when I was a kid and he was the cool uncle only 9 years older than I. But as an adult, I've found I just can't stand the man he's turned into.

I knew that going down there would be too emotional, and it was something that felt "forced." I realized that, for lack of a better word, my uncle and his wife had become pretty much irrelevant to my life.

10 days later he died. And so I returned to my parents' home for the funeral less than 2 weeks after I'd left, this time joined by my younger brother. I only spent two nights there on this trip, and I knew I wouldn't be returning two weeks later for Christmas. It's not that my parents are bad people, it's just that I am bored silly around them. We have almost nothing in common, and the things we DO have in common are only good for a few rounds of conversation. After that, I just can't stand to be there.

Part of it is being gay, but not being able to talk to them about it (they KNOW, I mean, I lived with Adrian for 5 years, but none of us have ever acknowledged it, and I'm tired of dancing around the issue). Part of it is the fact I've been out on my own for 20 years and have spent most of that time living a thousand or two thousand miles away, and have had my own life while they've had theirs. Part of it is that I've surrounded myself with friends who DO give me the intellectual, emotional, and social stimulation I need, and around them I CAN be myself, so that gives me an alternative to hanging out with my family out in the country. And finally, part of it is the example of my parents themselves. My dad was in the military and we lived all over the country, so just like my parents didn't live near their families and spend lots of time with them, I also have a life that's developed apart from my family.

This will probably leave some of my friends with a sense of disbelief, especially those who live in cultures where it's common to actually live with your parents well into your 20s and even your 30s and maybe even longer. They may think it's sad I don't have more of a bond with my family, but to me it's not sad...it's just normal. And I'm OK with it.

This shouldn't be that big a surprise, I guess. Back in April, when my mom asked about maybe coming up here for a few days, I looked at the calendar and told her there was a weekend in July when she could come but other than that it would probably be October before I could host her again, and even that was iffy. Why? Because my time was taken up with dragon boat, with races, with travel, with birthdays, with holidays...basically, with my friends. It should have been pretty obvious to me who was more important.

It's not that I don't care about my family, and I certainly don't dislike them. It's just that their lives and mine aren't relevant to each other. And while I will make some effort to keep my mom happy (I know she wants a more traditional relationship, which I can't say we've ever really had) there's only so much I'm willing to subvert my life to her wishes. I only get one life, and I'm going to live it as I need to.

So no, I didn't go home for Christmas this year, and I don't see myself doing it much in the future. As one friend put it, "they had you for 22 years...now it's time for the rest of the world to have you."

Labels: Family, Friends, Life

A few weeks back I was spending the evening with a close friend and our talk turned to the months since his graduation from his master's degree program and the changes I've seen in him since then. His transition to the real world after 18 years of school has been a pretty good one...despite some uncertainty at work, he has adapted very well and is happy to be doing what he's doing there. He's also adjusted his personal life from one that revolved around papers and exams and school friends to one that allows for a bit more flexibility. Bravo. We went on to talk a bit about how things have changed for him during the two years we've known each other, and it was a nice bit of reflection.

The conversation took an unexpected turn when he started talking about changes he's seen in me over the last two years. (I say "unexpected" because, while I feel like I follow my friends closely, I often feel like no one's paying close attention to me...I guess I'm wrong, but that feeling still is there sometimes.) Anyway, I thought he said that, during the last few months, I've become more "collaborative" when I'm with friends. I wasn't sure what he meant, then realized he'd said "callibrative" -- that is, I'm "calibrating" things. More to the point, I'm spending a lot more time thinking about my clothes and appearance, far more than I did before, and the effect isn't always a good one. He felt I was trying to change my style to something specific, and it might be something not quite right for me...my body has changed in the last year (in a good way, thank you Cali Fitness), and things that might have once looked good don't anymore. I also have to remember that I'm not 18. And I also should remember that I'm not Asian, so something that looked good on Singaporeans doesn't necessarily look good on me. In other words, I go a bit too far sometimes.

This was good for me to hear because he's absolutely right, and it's something I'd wondered about at times, but no one said anything so I just kept going with it. But the other reason I needed to hear this was something else he said: "When I met you I remember thinking you had a good sense of style that was right for you, that you were well put-together." The reason that's useful for me to hear is because no one had ever told me that before...I've gotten negative feedback from people important to me during the last 10 years or so, but rarely anything positive like that, and so I'm not used to it. I'm more used to being told I'm doing something wrong than I'm doing something right, and so hearing something like that reminded me that maybe I was all right as I was and really didn't need to change too much.

This wasn't just about clothes...my friend also suggested that maybe I've been meeting people who I wouldn't normally have met before, and maybe these aren't the type of people I should be meeting (he was, I think, referring to a certain 21-year old I chatted up at a recent party, but there were probably a couple other good examples too). He was concerned that, with all my experiences early this year and the changes in my life during the last few months, I might be trying to fix things that don't need fixing.

In other words, I was a pretty good guy as I was.

That's not to say there aren't things about me I can improve, Lord knows there are. And it's not to say I shouldn't try new things (the running has certainly paid off, as has the gym work, and all the professional writing I've been doing over the last year has been a great learning experience). But I need to remember that at my core I'm a good guy and there are some things about me that should stay as they are. I should trust myself more.

Yes, I know I get positive feedback, like getting a promotion or getting selected for the exchange program to Singapore, but those decisions were made by people I don't know and don't really care about. And yes, the fact that I've met some incredible people during the last 2 years, and they like me, and our friendships have endured even if we're 10,000 miles apart, is a good sign. But the people important to me usually hadn't said much about the issues of which I was uncertain, and it was nice to hear that maybe I was doing well all along and didn't need to worry so much.

One thing I've noticed is that this particular friend is paying me little compliments every now and then, making me think that he picked up on my uncertainties and is trying to correct them. It's nice to know someone's paying attention. And that they care enough to show it. :-)

So hopefully, when Stan comes to visit in a couple weeks, he'll see the Will he liked, not the 19-year old, New York-style, Singaporean Will who started to emerge this fall. I think he'll like Original Will better.

Though he can still call me Custard Bun if he wants to.

Labels: Friends, Life, Wandering Mind

I had a nice weekend in New York. A little photography, a little clubbing, a little shopping, and visits to both Uniqlo and Topman, which are like a combination of clubbing and shopping. I took the bus up and back (I’m actually on the bus headed home as I write this) and I remember now why I’m not a fan of this type of travel. It just takes too long. The train is faster, and more reliable. Unfortunately, it also costs 5x as much, so I need to occasionally take the bus on these trips.

Today was spent kicking around with Scott. He found a place for brunch that had this wonderful invention called “unlimited mimosas.” The waitress seemed to come by every time the level in our glasses dropped an inch, and she finally reached the point where she quit pouring orange juice and just went with straight champagne. When our glasses hit empty I figured they were dropping a hint. Anyway, we had a great few hours hanging out, we’ve known each other for almost 10 years (yes, Scott, it HAS been that long), having first met through our blogs when he was in college, and we can talk about pretty much anything. It’s nice to have a friend like that. Plus, he let me take photos of him, but only if I promised not to put them on Facebook (so they’ll go on Xtube instead).

I needed this weekend. Though I think I enjoy these visits more when I come with someone, I do occasionally need a weekend on my own. The nice thing about New York -- really, about traveling anywhere -- is that I can reinvent myself for a weekend if I need to, put aside whatever has been bugging me and just be me, or be the person I (temporarily) want to be. This weekend I needed to put aside work, put away some personal issues that have been dogging me for a couple months, and just walk around and be a fun guy without worrying about anything.

This doesn’t mean I’ll return to work Monday happy to be there, but it does mean I’ll go back with some good memories.

The weekend wasn’t perfect...there was more I wanted to do, but the truth is, I arrived Friday night pretty exhausted already. Between stress from work and not getting enough sleep I think I have worn myself out. Add in some clubbing Friday night until 3am,and walking around lower Manhattan all day Saturday, and by Saturday night I was one tired boy. Next time, I’ll try to rest up in advance for my vacation.

Overall, though, it was what I needed. Plus, I got some Christmas shopping done, and that was the most important thing!!

Labels: Friends, Travel

People often tell me I don't seem as old as I am. Some are talking about looks, some are talking about attitude, but all of them are right. I definitely don't feel as old as I am, and while I can remember what my parents were like at this age, I don't think I'm anything like them.

But I've come to realize that this can work in the opposite direction as well. Some of my younger friends seem "older" than their ages. I put "older" in quotes (imagine me doing that thing with my fingers while talking) because they don't look older, and they don't really act a certain age. They just seem closer to my place in life than do other people of the same biological age. It's not even really about maturity...it seems like it's more about life experience.

This occurred to me today at a friend's birthday dim sum. We were talking about a mutual acquaintance (we'll call him A) that I was hanging out with recently. My friend asked me, "would you ever think of you two getting together?" I'm going to assume he was talking about dating rather than about a hookup, and my answer, pretty quickly, was no. I said that A -- though he is a thoroughly sweet guy and incredibly nice, and someone whom I love spending time with -- is just a bit too hyper and unfocused for me. Naturally, on the drive home, I thought a bit more about it.

Now, A is 23, and yes, that's a bit younger than I, and we'd also been talking about another guy (we'll call him B) who's 21 and a bit immature. But I thought, "it can't be the age." Let's think about it. Stan was 23 when we started dating last year, and we made for a pretty good pair of boyfriends. Linh is 24 now, and he and I are very close friends. What is it about these guys that sets them apart?

I really think it's a combination of all their experiences, which give them a certain perspective on life that's very different from those of some other guys their age. They've traveled, and spent time living in a foreign country. They're educated, with a strong desire to keep learning. They have an idea of what they want to do in life. They've both worked in jobs that have an important purpose behind them. It's not just that they've "grown up" (which sounds patronizing anyway), it's that they have life experiences comparable to mine. They may have more experience in some things, less in others, but the basic frameworks of our lives have enough similarity that we can understand and appreciate each other in a way that helps us create a close bond. The fact that they're 25 or 24 years old doesn't matter...since age is just a number.

If you ask me why I tend to be around younger people more than older ones, it's because there's something else I share with these guys that many people my age seem to have lost: self-discovery and a desire for new experiences. Something I realized back in my early 30s, when I started grad school, was that many of my age peers had stopped trying new things. They were settled into a routine and didn't want anything new. That's fine for them, because they're happy, but that made it tough for me to be around them, because I wasn't content to stop discovering (and I'm still not). They were too much like I remember my parents being at that age. And so I tended to be around younger people (actually, being in school made that an easy thing to do). That's something that has continued to this day.

So yeah, it's really not the numerical age that matters...it's the person, whether younger or older.

I'm very lucky to have the friends I do, both at home and overseas, because they fit me so well and make my life so much more fun and enjoyable. I don't mind getting older if I get to grow older with them.

Labels: Age, Friends, Life

Well, CRD called it right in his comment on this morning's message: 4:20:11!!!!

Which means I beat my goal by nearly 10 minutes; I beat my previous Personal Record (from February's Hong Kong Marathon) by over 14 minutes; and, I shaved 16 minutes off last year's Marine Corps Marathon time.

If I can keep making that kind of progress each year, I'll be ready for the 2016 Summer Olympics.

Everything went well. The weather was perfect. My body held together, with only some minor pain around Mile 15 and later at Mile 19, and a cramp that started just before Mile 25 (and I thought "oh HELL no!!!" -- I wasn't going to put up with that so close to the end, so I told me leg to stop cramping, and it did). I was pretty consistent in my timing: my first 5K were run in 29:55 and my final 5K were run in just under 32 minutes, so not much variation throughout the day. I had friends out at the National Mall, and friends at the Finish Line, and that was very cool.

So, a great day overall!!!! Thanks everyone for your support!!!!

Labels: Friends, Running

I'd like to think I can do things on my own, but the truth is, it's definitely easier with friends.

When I was running the Army 10-Miler I hit the 8-mile point, where I needed a push, and instead felt like I was on my own. None of my other friends were running the race, and there were no supporters for me along the route...I had the feeling that, if my other friends were running there'd be people out to support THEM, but because it was just me, nobody came out. Yes, I was feeling sorry for myself. It didn't help that I was falling behind the pace I needed to meet my goal. I almost gave up -- "why should I do this, who cares?" -- but I woke up out of that and kicked it into high gear and ended up running my fastest time ever.

And it turns out I should have given my friends more credit than that. As I finished and collected my gear I saw a message on my phone from Linh telling me he was at the 8-mile point but was afraid he'd gotten there too late to see me. He did get there a few minutes after I passed, but that's not the point. I should have realized he'd be there...my bad.

This weekend, none of that is a factor at all. Four of us -- me, Ethan, Vu, Troy -- are running it this year and have spent time training together. A message went out to AQUA encouraging people to come out and cheer us on, and giving them the info they need to track us online. Speaking of that, I've got friends across the country and across the world who are planning to follow online as well. I'm crashing at Linh's Saturday night, which means I get an extra half hour's sleep Sunday because he lives fairly close to the race (plus I can walk to the Metro from his place rather than having to worry about driving and parking), and he and Kevin and a bunch of other folks are planing to be out there for us during the race.

So yeah, as much as I like being able to do things on my own, it's MUCH more fun with my good friends.

I am SO ready for this.

Labels: Friends, Running

Today the Zen-like state was facilitated by getting out of the office.

I went to a seminar at a local university, had a nice lunch with Linh outside his office building, and went for a second interview for a teaching post I'm hoping to get next year. Even though you'd think interviews would be stressful, I found that just being away from my office made me much calmer. Last night I was pretty upset about some stuff going on there, but I let it all go today. I despise my job and have very little respect for most of the people there, so any day away from there is a good day.

If I thought I could get away with taking the whole day off Friday, I'd do that too.

I really want to run. I feel fat when I don't run. Though honestly, anything that builds up during these days of rest is totally going to get used up Sunday.

Labels: Friends, Running, Work

Last night I had dinner with a friend who's getting ready to graduate from university. He's feeling a little stressed with the transition from school to the working world, thinking about what he's going to do for work, what makes him happy, how to keep from wasting the next 20 years before he figures out what he really wants to do. These are all normal questions, and I've been through this before, and of course I'm more than happy to talk with him about it.

By the time the evening ended he was apologizing for getting "so heavy" and promised that next time we'd have a movie night without talking about big stuff.

But it isn't an issue for me, talking about the big stuff. I don't mind it at all. Friends have issues, and they need to talk about them. Lord knows I do it. So hopefully, he was paying attention when I told him we could talk any time about anything he needs to discuss. I won't tell him what to do...I'm more likely to just ask questions until he figures out the answers himself.

I feel like, if there's one thing I can do for my friends, it's just to be there for them. A friend recently told me he thinks I'm one of the most empathic people he knows, able to put feelings into words better than most people. If that's the skill I've got, then I should use it for them, yes?

Lately I've been going through a bit of a transition myself, and have needed to rely on a friend. I worry sometimes that I bring too much of "the heavy stuff" with me, but I've needed the talking, and it's helped a lot. Fortunately, there are a couple friends here who can handle it, and who help me through down times, and if it weren't for them I'd be a mess. I try not to drag the heavy stuff in with me too much...it's nice to just have lunch or go shopping or watch a movie without worrying about things.

Not everyone's like that. I have another friend here (who doesn't read this, so it's OK to write about it) who will share with me what's going on with him. But if I try to raise things going on in my own life, he tends to view things only from his own perspective, wondering why I don't do things exactly like he would do, why I don't see things like I see them. That doesn't help much...it makes me feel defensive. So I don't bring the heavy stuff to him anymore, not that I ever got too awfully serious in our discussions anyway.

I guess I just feel lucky to have some friends I can count on, and if I'm able to give a tiny bit back, then that's pretty good.

As for movie night...I'm looking forward to it. And if the post-movie talk turns to the meaning of life, I'm OK with that, too.

Labels: Friends, Life

Stan's farewell from DC got stretched out over a week. Last weekend we had his farewell party at my place with about 20 people. They turned out to all be people he met since we first met in October 2007, mutual friends all. Though he had other friends in Washington, some had moved away, and others had just sort of faded from sight in the last few months. So, the folks we had were the fun people. :-)

The party went well and much fun was had. I ended up not making the food myself but either buying it, or in a couple cases counting on friends who like to make food. During the run up to the weekend I was trying to get the condo together, as I've been reorganizing the place since Adrian moved out, and he still has stuff there so I needed to work around that. I was also trying to get Stan's going away gift: I created a photo book of pictures taken since we met, including pics from our travels as well as here at home. I finished it, but it didn't arrive from the printer in time for the party.

The party was on Sunday afternoon; I like to plan parties then because no one ever makes plans for Sunday afternoon. I was stressed leading up to it because I really wanted Stan to enjoy it and for everyone to have fun. Fortunately, Linh volunteered to arrange for the cake and then come help me set up, and in the process helped me calm down a bit. Ethan offered to make spring rolls (though he thought the party started at 4 rather than at 2...oops) and Tuan went to the Vietnamese deli for me to pick up an order (and it turned out the place I ordered from wasn't the place I thought it was, but he figured it out).

We had folks over until about 6, and everyone seemed to have a good time. I've noticed at my parties that there's some self-segregation...the people who've known me longer tend to hang out together, the people I've meet since moving back in '06 are in another group. Interesting.

So after that I relaxed a bit, then started thinking about the next weekend. Stan was packing all week and I was working, plus there was the minor issue of Thursday's colonoscopy, but we had plans. Friday night our friend Kevin took us out and we went to a new place (well, new to us) that served Cajun-style food. We called it a night after that because I was running 13 miles the next day and Stan had plenty to do to clear out of his apartment.

Then, Saturday night, we had a small group of friends over for dinner. I have been looking for an excuse to cook again (Adrian kind of took over the fancy dinner party cooking when we were together) and this was a good chance to bring some of our closest friends together. The menu didn't turn out quite like I expected, as some of the ingredients weren't available, but I mostly made it work out. The entree took longer to prepare than I expected but everyone was patient. Afterwards, we headed out to Town, where Stan had a chance to say goodbye to a few other folks. We were pretty beat by the end of the night -- it was a crazy busy day -- but we loved it.

Sunday was pretty chill. We had a great brunch at our favorite place, then took care of things around home, like packing for our trip (well, MY packing...Stan was ready to go). After dinner I told Stan to put on his shoes, we were going for a drive. We ended up at the end of the runway at National Airport, watching as the planes landed over our heads. Back before we started dating I'd thought it would be romantic to take Stan there, but before I ever did he mentioned that someone at work had talked about doing that and Stan thought that sounded like a pretty cheap date. So, I never took him...but I decided we needed to do that befoe he leaves. With the cheesy mmusic playing on the radio, it turned out to be pretty romantic...in my opinion, anyway.

Though the farewell seems stretched out, it's all going to come to a sudden stop next Friday in Denver. We'll see how it all goes.

Labels: Friends, Relationships